This is absolutely excellent news, Iām so happy for you. Youāre getting over the wobble, keep regaining your balance. You are the blue heron!!
Yes! Smash day 2 to pieces.
Day 204
Weight: 53.1kg
Food Intake: (1543+kcal in, ~1850kcal)
- 112g NewHuel, MochaFS & Banana Flavdrops
- 150g chicken slices
- 100g carrots
- 2 Bueno + 10 butterfingers
- 5 butterfingers aight imma stop buying these as part of my stash; rn canāt stop oops. will eat a protein bar or fruits or popcorn instead
- 60g Huel Granola
- 200g Skyr
- csbiscuits&bread&stuff
Activity: (1655kcal out)
- 6255 steps total
Other Observations:
- Already ate ~850+ calories in 2h; but Iām confident I still got this day under control!
- Iām REALLY TIRED so that definitely makes me crave food mentally even when not hungry
- Havenāt really had binge urges; especially once I established to myself that bp=weight gain lel
- 4.35pm: Slight binge urges (it seems tempting because I donāt have too many cals left for dinner) but I will force myself to look more long term
Days B/P Free: 2 Days
@MarkyT smashed it!!!
GET.THE.FUCK.IN.
Well done @jeffy89, this is genuinely superb news.
Look day 3 square in the eyes and shake your head slowly and silently at it. Day 3 needs to heed your warning.
Inb4 mod profanity edit
I donāt think they give a @%&Ā£ on this thread GTI, my sweary post from the other day is still fully intact!
Chris you are doing brilliant as MarkyT has said, keep goooooing!!!
Iāve had stuff removed by Tim before
Thatās the thing about being a plant, you get away with all sortsā¦
Day 205
Weight: 52.8kg this is what not bping does! regularity!
Food Intake: (3645kcal in)
- 1/2 of 112g Huel
- 53g Huel Granola
- The Lunchā4 fruit sticks (1 melon, 1 pineapple, 2 grapes, 1 strawberry), 5 root veggie chips, veggies w 2t hummus, BBQ mealworms
- 1 Huel Orange Bar this wasnāt as mind blowing as Iād expected from the reviews, but tastes good nonetheless and better than original!
- 100g carrots
- 150g chicken slices
- 1/2 onion cheese toastie MODERATION AT ITS BEST!! Was gonna delegate this in my head as binge food but I decided to share it with my Friend instead
- cabbage, mushroom, salted egg fish skin,
- cssunbites, kitkat, marshmallow, yogurt bar, oreo
- 1804kcal bpā300g ice cream, 255g iced madeira cake
Activity: (1675kcal out)
- 5364 steps total
Other Observations:
- I have a free lunch that Iām going to (and possibly dinner) so this is kind of iffy ground for me, but Iām determined to practise moderation. I CAN fit things into my calories (heck I fit 15 butterfingers into my calories yesterday)
- Huel becoming a norm: On the off chance the Huel staff actually sees my posts, good job on the marketing front; Huel is actually starting to become such a norm at my Uni! Itās made its way onto meme pages (and when everyone starts tagging each otherā¦you realise how far reaching and popular Huel is here!). Itās actually pretty cool because now Iām starting to feel a lot less weird talking about it, and have actually convinced many of them to give it a go!
- 3.23pm: Survived Lunch sensibly! Huel satiated me enough to make good decisions; mostly ate fruits and veggies with some hummus & mealworms (LOL)
- Uni stress and a hectic schedule is real. Iām acknowledging that I wonāt be able to workout everyday as I did back home, or get my 10000 steps in all the time. And thatās okay. More exercise is better than none, and I ultimately want to celebrate my body being able to move and to take care of it instead of as punishment.
- 1.48am: ā¦Iād hate to admit itā¦but 3 days bp free is a no go Really sorry to disappoint you guys @MarkyT and @VenusFly I tried so frikin hard throughout the whole day but I had way too many triggers that by the end of it when I got home I just was so done with mentally fighting my demons that I caved. Too much, too fast, all at once. Itās also really hard because in the next week I have too many social events going on and ://// If I gotta purge some Iāll at least try not to go on a full-blown binge. Nonetheless I HAVE seen how amazing & regulated the last 2.5 days have been and I WANT THAT. I see how great Huel makes me feel too. Iām not going to stop trying.
- Unknown lunch
- Being peckish the whole day trying to study
- Toastie temptation
- Unknown dinner & cals & cake
- Having overeaten
- Going to my mailbox and having received a ton of snacks in surprise care-packages
- Kinda-bf surprised me with my favourite cake
- Looking at my schedule and realising itās unlikely Iāll be able to carry my bp-free streak for longā¦
- My throat really hurts
@MarkyT YES IāLL TRY MY BEST thank you!! I havenāt gone 3 days without bp-ing here yet, so todayās gonna be the kicker!
@GTIPuG @VenusFly LOL you guys are hilarious! Although if you notice carefully, Iām pretty sure the Huel guys donāt even know my thread exists; theyāve never had any interaction with these posts ever! Curse away!
Enjoy your lunch & dinner, you can deffo do moderation & IF you blow your calories a bit, itās better to have blown them a bit than to blow them, then go on a binge cos youāve blown them, then purge cos you binged. You donāt have to be perfect, just going in the right direction, which you certainly seem to be now.
Just think how youāll feel if youāve blasted through day 3, into unchartered territory. Day 4 will be running scared. You are doing fantastically well Chris and you should be very proud of your progress.
Mealworms? Training for an appearance on āIām a celebā?
Day 206
Weight: 52.7kg
Food Intake: (2741kcal In)
- 1/2 of (112g NewHuel, BananaFD)
- 1 slice hummingbird cake
- 2 chicken thighs w a lot of stir fried beans
- 1642kcal bp
Activity: (2220kcal out)
- Cycling & 2.5h Acro Dance
- 9196 steps total
Other Observations:
- Feeling like quite the failure and my throat is also an absolute wreck :< why do I do dis. Already feeling quite defeated for today
- Itās crazy how that one bp has the ability to make me feel so unable to do ~life~ sigh but nO I CAN DO THIS I CAN ENJOY TODAY.
- Just to ventādid Acro and loved it; but at some point in time one guy rudely said āwow, are you heavier than ___?ā Wtf
Iām really sad to read you broke your streak Chrisā¦ Is it possible for you to try next week to not purge no matter how you feel, to try to cope with your emotions set off by the triggers & daily stress in a different way? Just for a week, & you can tell yourself that you can go back to b/p as a coping strategy (even tho itās a shitty one thatās wrecking your throat, health & life) but not until this week is over & youāve given your throat chance to heal, & yourself some much needed insight into what you are going to do & how you are going to live without the b/p comfort blanket. This is tough, scary stuff & I am speaking very plainly to youā¦ If you are able to access your psych for support right now then I really think you should. And keep enjoying the good things you have going on right nowā¦ Like the kinda bf! Tell him to bring you flowers instead of cake if that is a trigger for you?
You can beat this thing, itās just monkey mind shit & itās not going to have you. Donāt forget who you are & who you are becomingā¦ Through our failures we are made perfectā¦ Tempered like metal in the flames & made strongerā¦ You are the blue heron
Day 207
Weight: 52.6kg
Food Intake: (~2109kcal in)
- 1/2 Huel, Choc PB FD
- 150g chicken
- 163g carrots
- 80g Huel Granola
- Pepsi Max (bc I donāt like soft drinks but I canāt taste anything so Iām getting rid of this like water & I can feel the carbonation on my tongue bc of the pH interaction lmao)
- cspopcorn
- Formal Dinnerācheese, fish, pear tart, chocolate cake
Activity: (1692kcal out)
- 7857 steps total
Other Observations:
- My nose is blocked so I canāt taste anything YET IM STILL SO PECKISH ugh
- Feeling kinda sick and lethargic
Just seen your update on the guy at acro!! Super rude, Iām nearly twice your weight & he could f**k off saying that to me too! If you go to that class & see him again, try & work a swift kick in the nuts into your moves āby accidentā, that guy deserves it.
Day 208
Weight: 52.0or6kg
Food Intake: (2642kcal in)
- 1/2 of 112g NewHuel, ChocPBFD + 1 orange Huel bar
- 2 percy pigs
- 60g Huel granola
- 1 tub halo top (320kcal, 20g protein)
- 150g chicken & 78g carrots
- 1/2 of 112g NewHuel, ToffeeFD
- 1 small kfc chicken piece
- 1033kcal bpāoatmeal, chicken curry rice
Activity: (1903kcal out)
- 8411 steps total
Other Observations:
- Converted 2 of my friends to Huel hehehehehehe my friend was like ālol youāre basically a Huel ambassadorā ngl she aināt wrongā¦
- Had another basically perfect day (40:30:30 macros!) aaaand then I had my friendās KFC chicken piece and was triggered to bp SIGHHHHH I mean, Iām proud of myself for going to sainsburys and not buying binge food, but I literally made frikin OATMEAL to bp on. Wtf.
- I think Iām gonna count the days I donāt b/p but not streak-wise. Everyday matters I guess. Gonna try to hit at least 10 by the end of November.
days b/p free since 31 Oct 2018: 2
@VenusFly Ugh some people are really just so rude! Oh well, brushing it off; I know Iām making the effort to make myself better and thatās all that matters Although ofc not gaining a whole bunch of fat and being unable to be a flyer is definitely an incentive lmao. Another guy commented āoh youāre light!ā so ehh I guess itās relative. Still stings ngl but not very important in the grand scheme of things.
Exactly, aināt no way youāre heavy at the weight you are, the rude guy was just weak, in body & in character. I still think he needs a sly kickingā¦ But Iām an evil bish like that bodyshamers, do not step to me!! Comments like that sting no matter what your actual weight is, & he was way out of order & talking complete bullā:poop:!
Day 209
Weight: 51.7kg !!! FINALLY !!! It really does help not planning my binges bc then it wonāt be thousands of calories ingested like the 6000 i was eating before lmao. Keep trying throughout the day!
Food Intake: (2999kcal in)
- 1 Americano
- 1/2 NewHuel, ToffeeFD
- 150g chicken slices + 100g carrots
- 1 Cadbury finger & a bite of Bakewell tart
- 1 Huel Orange Bar + 60g Huel Granola
- Formal Dinnerāsoup, bread, fish pie, toffee apple cake
- bpā2 ready meals, 1 small square fudge, 1 cashew thing, Nutella
Activity: (1885kcal out)
- 8726 steps total
Other Observations:
- Legit have nothing to binge onā¦honestly makes my binges smaller which is probably a good (albeit frustrating) thing. Neighbours in the kitchen too so I couldnāt make oatmeal to binge on again. Nor Nutella mugcake. Couldāve easily gone to sainsburys to get ice cream (in fact I was there but I only went to get chicken mostly) but I didnāt. Getting a tad better at not buying binge hauls.
- Drinking & eating more Huel has definitely helped reduce urges for sweetsāwalking around sainsburys i donāt really feel the desire to eat the cakes/cookies themselves, but more of the process and the ritual of the binge
- Tbh my binges are now the most randomass things like whytf those random meals lmao.
- I WILL NOT BP TOMORROW.
bp free (31/10): 2